We have all learned to live with voice mail as a necessary part of modern life (some of us more than others!) But you may have wondered, "What if God decided to install voice mail?" Imagine hearing this . . . "
Thank you for calling My Father's House. Please select one of the following options:
Press 1 for requests.
Press 2 for thanksgiving
Press 3 for complaints.
Press 4 for all other inquiries.
If you would like to speak to Gabriel, press 1,
for Michael, press 2,
for a directory of other angels, press 3.
If you'd like to hear King David sing a Psalm while you're on hold, press 4.
To find out if a loved one has been assigned to heaven, enter his or her social security number.
For reservations at My Father's House, press the letters J-O-H-N and then 3-1-6.
For answers to nagging questions about dinosaurs, the age of the earth, and where Noah's ark is located, please wait until you arrive here.
Our computers show that you have already called once today. Please hang up and try again tomorrow.
